Endurance drinking

Going out and having a good time with friends often (more often than not) involves the consumption of copious amounts of alcohol.

Pace yourself. Drink slowly. Know yourself.

Yeah yeah, we all know this. We've heard it before.

What? Really?

How long you last without setting your own underwear on fire or mistaking your host's wash basket for the toilet is almost entirely dependent on the ratio between the amount of alcohol and the red stuff in your veins.

This is where drinking is much like race driving.

Sober: We're doing about 170 km/h down the back straight. Corner approaches.

We know the braking point. 

We release the accelerator, press the brakes, turn in gently towards the apex of the bend and find the right moment to release the brakes and hit the accelerator again.

All fine and well when we know the entry speed.

Therefore, if we were doing 200 km/h, we would need to brake a bit earlier to make the apex. Logic.

Less than sober: 

The problem, however, comes in where we suddenly have turbochargers bolted on. 

Running high octane race fuel.

Now we approach the corner on the back straight at 240 km/h.

This is the problem I sometimes have with alcohol.

We realise, travelling at 240 km/h like we're on a relaxed game drive, that we've somehow missed the point to brake. The corner approaches much more rapidly.

Invariably, we miss the apex.

The wheels are turned in towards the corner, but about as useful as a waterproof teabag.

We proceed in the general direction of "the wrong way", straight on, and shoot past the corner, straight off the track, into the sand traps. If we're lucky.

Otherwise, we shoot straight over the sand traps and explode into the tyre wall.

And the next day we feel as if we've done this a few times over.

This is why it's important to eat something before you drink.

If there's some heavy stuff in the trunk, the car is slower.

This means you probably won't reach 160 km/h. 

See where I'm going with this?

It makes sense. Admit it.

Also, avoid mixing different fuels and additives. 

Especially all sorts fuels and additives of different grades.

It causes a build up of chemical compounds that don't agree with each other.

This can often lead to misfiring which dramatically impedes the performance of the vehicle in question.

If you must use additives, stick to additives designed for your particular fuel.

Know your vehicle. Understand that certain fuels could cause it to behave erratically.

Incorrect fuels could cause misfires, premature detonation, and even general malfunction.